Most of the time, we don’t get to choose our family. With the exception of a few adoptees, we are born in to them. Some, including me, are blessed to have great supportive families. What makes a family work is mutual support, the knowledge that you are there for the long haul, all of which forms the basis for a strong enduring love.
Now there is one time where we get to choose family, and that is when we decide to get married. Now I am lucky enough to have a great wife. We have been together for 8 years and we just passed our one year wedding anniversary (see Prescilla). Now we never really plan on having kids, so that was not part of the entire marriage equation. We had known for a long time that we were together for the long haul. The main reason I wanted to get married is that I considered her family and I wanted the rest of the world to recognize that.
This is why I was so upset about DOMA, and why the recent SCOTUS ruling feels so right. DOMA was the government telling people that their loved ones were not family – that he or she wasn’t good enough to visit you in hospital, receive health insurance, or inherit property. They were breaking up families, not making them stronger. It shouldn’t matter if love is homosexual or heterosexual anymore than you can choose to have brothers instead of sisters.
I am proud to live in a state that once again recognizes that love is love, and all families are equal.